Tuesday, 15 August 2017

worn out

As much as I love being a mum to my little boy, amidst the joy and wonder of it all, a lot of the time I just feel worn out, fragile, frayed at the edges. I think that being able to experience the joy despite that feeling of utter depletion is one of the greatest challenges of motherhood, a challenge I know I am not the only one to face.

Stitching is something that helps me rise to that challenge, finding myself again briefly in the gaps between mothering, soothing my sleep deprived self with rhythmic instinctive stitches.  Working with threadbare scraps and fragments, using up what was there and allowing myself some randomness, helped soothe my soul. It's not my usual stitching style, it's not my finest stitching hour but I created some ragged beauty.


Mo Crow said...

beautiful and x fingers you get can some good sleep soon!

Marlynne said...

Oh yes! It helps so much I'm sure to be able pick up something small and work on it for a few minutes at a time!

Unknown said...

Love your work with the needle! And your posts are very nice to read. ��
Your mind and fingers will find some new ways to express the mother feelings and also the new woman who growing stronger inside. To get a child opens up a door inside to unknown areas whithin. Enjoy the ride of transforming! I will for sure look forward to see the changings in your future works.
(Sorry for grammar errors. ☺)

Alexandra Kate said...

It is just as beautiful, in its own way, as the more planned and precise pieces. It is perfect because it has meaning. A little more ragged, a little more rushed, because that is how you feel. It is beautiful and honest.

Nancy said...

I'm a grandmother now but I still remember those early days with a new baby, an older infant, a toddler -- and the exhaustion of it. Enough sleep, enough energy to carry on was always the challenge. I think this piece speaks exactly to the feelings of early motherhood. Good for you to take even a few minutes to stitch each day.

bayou said...

A piece of art as always, Christine. Absolutely beautiful!

May said...

Beautiful post and Beautiful stitches...Motherhood is the hardest job on the planet we never get enough credit for how we care for our children sleepless nights, low energy, overwhelming tiredness at times.. You are doing a great job I watch my daughter go through the same at this time and like you she adores being a mother... I'm so glad you can find a little time to stitch as I know this is a big part of you your work is wonderful...Take care.... May x

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

You are feeling worn out but your work is still beautiful.

Enjoy each day and all of the blessings that come with them.


Ruth said...

You are such an inspiration! That is truly another thing of beauty from your heart and hands. Just as those old scraps were once brand new, that's the way our lives play out, piece by piece until we're worn, patched, and wiser. It doesn't help much to think that one day you'll be alone with your stitching when your beautiful little boy is grown and gone. It's no consolation right now to know that these days will fly by so quickly you'll find yourself stunned one day at the other end of your present path. For now, take joy in every moment with him, and take even more joy for yourself when he's napping, or tucked in for the night. You are walking in the footsteps of every mother, except that all mothers aren't able to create from "nothing" as you do. Talk about leaving footsteps on the sands of time!

All worn out feelings flee away when those joyous moments come, when you hear the first sentences, see his first accomplishments, and when you awaken in him a love of nature and preserving what we've been given with such reverence as you exhibit. Your son has a truly special mother - be gentle with yourself!!!!

Unknown said...

Do you know there are fabulous communities of mother artists and artist mothers who make work about these things and really support one another in their endeavours; Desperate Artwives, procreate Project, Project Afterbirth, the Motherload. I'm part of most of them and they're brilliant even at a distance. You'd be welcomed;)

C Reeder PhxAz said...

I just found your blog today. Have spent time reading way back. Very moved. I know it's hard adjusting to being a new mom - it seems like yesterday my craft room moved to the dining room. They are now 33 and 35 with art studios of their own. Make moments which will turn into time - it will be ok. Keep your needle and thread part of your daily walk. Some days it may surprise you to have time. On days it's moments dream in a journal and when time comes take those sketches and make them reality. Blessings to you. (Paracletedesigns@gmail.com)

Margaret said...

I am an "old mom". That is, I am the mother of children-now-grown. I remember those days...but your piece moved me in a different way. Being 'worn out' is not uncommon at any season of life, especially as one moves into a place where one is remembering life lived, and pondering the world around oneself. That is where I am now, and some days I feel very worn out indeed. The 'ragged beauty' you have created is a blessed reminder that beauty does very much remain in the world, if only one would pause, breathe, and look deeply. Thank you.

Eliane Zimmermann said...

beautiful! seriously! be brave, the sleep deprived times will improve, trust in it!

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